Lately I have been thinking about how I could change my life. Truth is I am sick of the norm. I want a change but I am not sure where to start. Part of me is eager for my life to go in another direction and the other part of me is scared to death. As a whole, I don't take change very well...not at all. Change scares me. So I am constantly fighting a battle with myself on if I should change or just stick with status quo.

In about a year I am not planning on being here. Hopefully I will be somewhere in Southern Cali. going to school. This is something that excites me and I can't wait to do, but then again, it scares me cause it is a big move. And of course I worry about everything: how am I going to pay for this, how am I going to manage in a big city all by myself my first time away from home, what if this, what if that...ugh..it's stressful. And I know a year is pretty far away, but I need to get the ball rolling on this stuff now...and in all honesty I am afraid to. I am not a strong person and it is tough for me to take a stand in my own life and say, 'hey I am going to do this and Nothing is going to stop me.' Maybe, so far in my life, nothing has motivated me enough to do that. Maybe that is what I need..some good motivation. Anyone got some extra they'd like to get rid of?

"On the scales of desire your absence weighs more than someone else's presence." ~ 311, Uncalm