Homesick

I am very homesick lately. I am not sure what has caused this...probably the holiday season. I just find myself sad and emotional lately. I have been away from home about 3 years and it's harder on me now than it was when I first got down here. I can't seem to get used to not being around my parents. I really hate it. It's the one thing that sucks the most about living here. Sometimes you just need a hug from them, sometimes you just need to sit and watch TV with them, sometimes you just need their presence. I feel a bit immature being 24 and feeling this way. I think my greatest fear is having something happen and I won't be there...that kills me. And I don't know how to make myself feel good about being away from them. I don't know why I can't "let go" like other people seem to. Maybe it wouldn't be so hard if I could see my parents more than two or so times a year. I really have no one here. Merc and Ong are the closest thing that I have to family around here and I appreciate it so much, but it's just not the same.

I know my dad reads this...I love you guys very much and I am sorry I am not there. I miss you terribly.